The Toast Family’s Magic Radio.

R.F. Marazas

© 2006

 

        There was no reason for him to notice the new radio. Amid the clutter of his life it was just another possession, one more thing. Yet he paused in his cramped basement office to stare at the sleek black gadgetized rectangle. He read: AM-FM, marine band, police calls, transoceanic pickup, super non-drift tuner. 

 

        Arthur Toast squeezed his eyes shut, swaying with the force of his anger. Only after a half dozen long shuddering breaths had smothered his rage was he able to open them again. The radio was still there. He refused to look at it but its image burned in his brain. He climbed the steps to the kitchen. His self-control bent his shoulders forward in rigid stillness and set his jaw in a clenched ache.

 

        The kitchen subdued him. The fabulous Futuron kitchen. Spotless, self-cleaning home within a home. Operating room green. A whirring mechanized hum (he’d never discovered its source) reassured you that if needed, surgery could be performed here any time of day or night. Arthur had long ago stopped eating breakfast here. He imagined that there were robot hens hidden behind the walls, busy laying synthetic eggs.

 

        Maureen Toast gulped coffee, dabbed her lipsticked mouth with a napkin. When had she gained all that weight? He couldn’t recall the last time he’d seen her, but surely it hadn’t been that long.

 

        “Where are you off to on Sunday night?”

 

        She frowned at him, caressing the fur of her mink jacket. “Arthur, you know very well that tonight is the fund raising dinner for the new gymnasium.”

 

        “See if you can raise some funds for the Toast family,” he said.

 

        “Don’t be silly. I’ve pledged five hundred.”

 

        “You did what?”

 

        “Now Arthur, don’t look so shocked. Do you want your children playing in a rundown old gym?”

 

        “But we can’t afford---”

 

        “I’m sure you’ll work something out, dear. You always do. I have to rush now.”

 

        The smudge of her lips on his cheek left only a slight stirring of air around his face. He stood there dumb and confused, trying to recall something.

 

        The radio! I didn’t tell her about the radio! We don’t need it, we can’t afford it, when will this family learn?

 

        There was a sound to his right like a nervous cough. He backed out of the kitchen, watchful. Perhaps the robot hens were restless.

 

        The radio had a fine sound. At least it would serve some purpose. He would not allow it to lie in the basement graveyard with the other relics. The four stacked, rusted bikes were down there, and the roller skates and the pool table, the ping-pong table, the countless games and toys, all untouched, forgotten. Their epitaphs the collection of receipts and bills and cancelled checks in Arthur’s desk.

 

        He would make use of the radio. It did have a fine sound. As he gathered the new stack of bills in front of him, he half-listened to the soothing music.

 

        Matching the bills against the list of credit cards, he groaned. Thirty-five credit cards for a family of five. Incredible. The luminous clock on the radio blazed a warning. Self-pity was time wasting. He must balance his accounts quickly if he was to work on the report he volunteered to do for Detmar. A thorough report could mean a salary increase. God knew he needed one!

 

        Sometime later Arthur’s head snapped up. He had worked too long, too hard. Muscles twitched between his aching shoulder blades. He rubbed the pinching pain in his eyes.  Something had broken his dogged concentration. He wasn’t certain what---

 

        “---hello Sea Devil, do I read you, are you reporting engine trouble---”

 

        Fool radio was hooked onto the marine band. What ever happened to that super non-drift tuner?

 

        He twisted the dials, peering suspiciously at the minuscule markings.

 

        “---hello Cozy Cove Marina, request dockage for twenty-four foot---”

 

        Damn! And twist. And damn again.

 

        “---this is Coast Guard 149, alert small craft, repeat---”

 

        Arthur sighed, snapping off the sound. With all his other problems he was certainly not going to upset himself over a damned radio. He would have it repaired. Turning off the light, he paused at the door. The luminous clock had stopped.

 

        Arthur Toast was plagued by nightmares that spilled over into his waking hours, until dream and reality merged in his mind. At times he would shed his skin, stand outside and watch his other self play scene after ridiculous scene. The outside Arthur would laugh at the other Arthur wandering about in openmouthed awe of what was happening to him.

 

        Scene after scene---

 

        “When did you buy that lovely radio, dear?”

 

        “Buy it! I didn’t buy it! You must have bought it, did you forget?”

 

        “I never bought it, perhaps one of the children---”

 

        “Damn radio. I had it fixed. Repairman wouldn’t believe it was locked in on the marine band. Looked at me like I was mad.”

 

        “Our five hundred dollar pledge for the gym is due next week.”

 

        “Good God, Maureen I’ve told you we have to curb this spending! We cannot go on keeping up with the Joneses!”

 

        “Oh? Friends of yours? Do invite them over some evening.”

 

        He had been wrestling with his financial juggling for over two hours when the radio began to change its sound. Sell some stock to make up the five hundred and that would leave the mortgage and if he could stall the car payment--- He stared at the radio. The super non-drift tuner was picking up two stations simultaneously. He hunched over, fingertips barely touching the dial, turning with infinite care. The radio spoke gibberish to him far into the night.

 

        Why should I make payments on three cars when I’m not sure I own three cars? When was the last time I saw three cars in my driveway? My wife, my children, maybe they’ve seen three cars. And what makes me think I have three children? When was the last time I saw three children in this house? They do leave clues around, expensive clues like ski equipment and tennis rackets and movie cameras. Their names are on credit cards so they must exist. Let me see that list of credit cards, I’ll remember their names once I see them, Christ that radio had better work tomorrow---

 

        Arthur decided to sleep in his office study all week. He would be closer to his work, would polish that report, would get that raise. The radio was there on his desk. Arthur set the clock each night, then frowned and stared at the radio as if by sheer force of will he might reach some kind of understanding with it.

 

        The nightmares became routine. Arthur climbed up an endless ladder of credit cards. Stacks of bills bulged all his pockets, the sheer weight making it harder to climb. And when he reached the top the last credit card buckled. He plunged down into blackness.

 

        Fighting his way awake, groggy, the first thing his bloodshot eyes saw was the radio. And he was late for work five days in a row.

 

        “Look, I don’t want a new radio. I want this one fixed!”

 

        “I keep telling you it is fixed. Don’t you hear it? Now tell me that it doesn’t work. Tell me that.”

 

        “What about the alarm? One day it won’t go off, the next day it goes off too early, another day the clock stops.”

 

        “The alarm checks out, let me show you.”

 

        “What about the police calls? I get nothing but police calls.”

 

        “Mr. Toast, let me---”

 

        “Then I can’t get anything but AM, then nothing but FM.”

 

        “Mr. Toast, are you sure you know how to work this---”

 

        “What about the Italian? I get this same goddam Italian on every station, the same words, and I can’t understand him---hey, are you fixing this goddam radio as a joke?”

 

        “Look, you calm down, maybe you better go to another repair shop---”

 

        “You bet I will! I’ll get this radio fixed, by God! It has to work! I need that soothing music when I pay all the bills---”

 

        “Sure, Mr. Toast, sure---”

 

        The report had been rejected. Too sloppy. Not enough original thought. Poor research, poor organization, on and on and how bad could a report possibly be?

 

        Arthur stood in the hallway of his house, quietly still. Maureen slowed her perpetual rush to glance at him.

 

        “That radio again? Honestly dear, every time I see you you have that radio tucked under your arm. Sometimes I think it’s attached to you.”

 

        “Got it fixed,” he mumbled. “It’s fixed now.”

 

        “By the by, we have a problem or two. We’ll need tuition money for Jody for college in the fall. And Jason had a slight accident with the car. The estimate is rather high, but you know how prices are these days. Oh, and Judy needs braces. She’s absolutely mortified about wearing them. But I insisted---

 

        Jody-Jason-Judy. Where had he heard those phantom names? A vaudeville act? He would remember later.

 

        “No money, no money,” he mumbled.

 

        “I’m sure you work something out, dear. You always do.”

 

        He sleepwalked into his study and plugged in the radio. It did have a fine sound. Slumping into his chair, he listened, stared, moved his hands in time to the music, conducting his phantom orchestra. For a long time.

       

        Then the radio stopped.

 

        He looked at it. He rose, reaching for the dial. It began playing again. He sat down, watching it, his hands poised to conduct. It stopped. The trembling began in his fingers and coursed through his whole body. He rose, shaking. The radio played. Not his orchestra but something savage, drums and wailing saxophones. He grabbed the radio and lifted it over his head, smashing it down hard on the desk. The volume rose out of control. Arthur whirled, fists pressed against his ears. His foot caught in the cord laying in an exposed tangle on the floor and he pitched forward. The radio snap-jerked off the desk in a tight arc and smashed Arthur in the back of the head.

 

        Hours later Maureen opened the study door. A shock wave of sound knocked her backward. She rushed in holding her ears, reached down and yanked the plug from the socket. The radio lay silent, shattered, but the sound, lower now, came from her right. Arthur sat on the floor amid a clutter of crumpled bills, eyes wide and unseeing, mouth open. From that black hole came a mellifluous voice in Italian, and then Greek, and then Japanese, and marine weather forecasts and police calls and some of the most beautiful music Maureen had ever heard. So beautiful she wept to hear it.

 

 

Author’s Bio: R.F. Marazas has been writing since his teens. He’s had two stories placed in the annual Writer's Digest contest and since retirement, He’s completed a novel, and published stories in two anthologies and in on-line venues.